


so illegal

by thehoppy



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Drug Use, F/F, Humanstuck, why did this get written
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-06-09
Updated: 2012-06-09
Packaged: 2017-11-07 08:55:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,011
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/429199
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thehoppy/pseuds/thehoppy
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“Oh Vriska.” Damn her, she sounds delighted. “Are you telling me you’ve never heard of shotgunning?”</p><p>“Like the wedding?”</p><p>Fuck fuck fuck no that is not what she meant to say.</p>
            </blockquote>





	so illegal

**Author's Note:**

  * For [arenoseAnima](https://archiveofourown.org/users/arenoseAnima/gifts).



> (shamelessly stole title from that one amazing mindfang/redglare comic)
> 
> Woo posting stuff. This got written due to someone's comment on tumblr being crazy inspiring, so instead of my first scourge fic being a way-long quadrant-flipping thing, it's Terezi and Vriska shotgunning weed (badly). Minimal regrets.

“Dinosaur,” Vriska insists, swigging from the bottle of cherry Gatorade balanced precariously on the bed.

It takes a moment for Terezi to answer—she’s more interested in stroking her hand back and forth over the sheets under her—but when she does it’s short and not at all sweet.

“No way.”

“You don’t believe me?” Vriska pouts from her half of the bed, knowing Terezi can’t see it, knowing she’ll probably pick up on it anyway.

“Not for a second.”

They’re smoke-watching, a game Vriska invented to make Terezi feel bad about not being able to see all the awesome shapes. It is so much better than cloud-watching. Except for the part where Terezi’s catching on to her, and refuses to believe in the amazing dinosaur she made up. Somewhere around the third—fourth?—joint, skepticism turned into gleeful distrust. She’s not even surprised.

It’s not all bad though. At least Terezi’s amusing herself in silence instead of doing anything weird, like—like smushing a hand against her lips, forcing her head into the headboard. Which is sort of hard, _ow_.

“Your mouth will get stuck that way if you keep it up,” she jeers, because _of course_ she knew what kind of face Vriska was making.

“You like my mouth,” Vriska says inanely, shoving the intrusive hand away.

Smoke wreathes Terezi’s head for all of half a second before drifting upwards in blooming, twisting clouds, but of course there was never a dinosaur in there. For a second she sees something that actually kind of reminds her of a dragon, but there’s no way she’ll tell Terezi that. She’d just smile in that vaguely creepy way of hers, and probably thank Vriska for being amazing enough to think of her. Then she’d admit Vriska was the best girlfriend ever, and deep kisses of appreciation would almost certainly be forthcoming.

Actually, mentioning dragons is starting to sound pretty good.

She pats the sheets around her in search of another joint, vision sharpening just a bit when she doesn’t find one.

“Pyrope. Hand ‘em over.”

“Last one,” Terezi says cheerfully, and when Vriska looks she’s surrounded by an obscenely thick haze while her outrageously accurate fingers tap the end of the joint over the ashtray between them.

It takes a moment to sink in, but when she realizes she’s been finding fake shapes while Terezi smokes all the weed, she makes a grab for the still smoking joint.

Terezi jerks away, coming dangerously close to falling off the bed. Not that it stops her from cackling while she somehow keeps her prize just out of Vriska’s reach.

“Come _on_ ,” Vriska whines, flapping her arm somewhere around Terezi’s shoulder. The movement feels exaggerated, but she’s long past precision. Terezi slaps her away, and a beat later blows a stream of smoke in her general direction.

“It’s almost _done_ ,” Vriska says through her teeth, already halfway to angry.

Terezi actually _licks_ the air in front of her, as if she can taste the smoke Vriska could be breathing in right now if her girlfriend weren’t such a huge moron.

“Almost,” she agrees, drawing from the joint between her fingers until it _is_ done and landing the roach in the ashtray with uncanny precision.

Vriska is ready to _shake_ Terezi, and not gently, but no exhale comes. Instead the stingy idiot is moving closer, no longer half a bed away.

Red hair and redder lenses fill her vision, and then her focus narrows to the deliciously full lips she could be kissing if she moved forward, just a little…

It’s all kinds of sloppy; Terezi’s ludicrous glasses bump against her nose, then a beat later someone loses their equilibrium and suddenly the shorter girl is pressed against her, warm even though it’s the middle of summer and the A/C’s been on for hours.

Vriska opens her mouth in a startled ‘oh,’ something Terezi takes every advantage of, and thank god Vriska’s always been a quick thinker because suddenly her mouth and lungs are filled with smoke and it’s all she can do not to start coughing and never stop.

Even with her superior reflexes and flawless genius, she’s aggressively clearing her throat the second Terezi pulls back.

“What—” She clutches the disgusting Gatorade to her, drinking deeply. All at once she’s feeling gratifyingly lightheaded. “What the hell was that?”

“Oh Vriska.” Damn her, she sounds delighted. “Are you telling me you’ve never heard of shotgunning?”

“Like the wedding?”

Fuck fuck fuck no that is not what she meant to say. She braces herself for gales of laughter, but Terezi is ominously silent before her mouth spreads in a stupid, attractive, improper smile. “Don’t worry. There’s plenty of time to teach you.”

Terezi’s hand searches behind her while Vriska sits, torn between seething and demanding to know why they haven’t done that sooner, god, didn’t anyone ever tell her girlfriend sharing was caring?

When Terezi finally stops feeling around and triumphantly holds up a joint, Vriska decides that yeah, she is definitely seething.

“My mistake,” her dirty lying girlfriend says, but of course it wasn’t a mistake at all. “ _Now_ there’s one left.”

Vriska, heart pounding away in her chest, grabs it before Terezi can decide to be a miserly jerk twice. That’s what she tells herself—but deep down, she knows she was already planning on trying their new method of sharing, even before the tip flares red.

Much later, Vriska remembers the dragon.

“Pyrope,” she mumbles. “Hey.”

Terezi groans at her, but she thinks it’s an awake groan.

“It was a dragon, not a dino.”

For almost a full minute Terezi says nothing, and Vriska’s just moving from disappointed to annoyed when an arm drapes itself around her waist and Terezi’s slight form melds uncomfortably and perfectly into her side.

“You’re not so bad, Serket.”

Maybe it’s the pleasantly fuzzy feeling in her head, or the way Terezi’s nestling against her shoulder, or because those five words are almost like three others she’s never let herself say, but it’s music to her ears.


End file.
